Insightful and Funny

The Midnight Dog Wash

2010-02-16T06:33:00.001-08:00

I tried to sleep last night.

I went to bed at 9:03, even thought I had the opportunity to stay up and watch TV.

But I went to bed.

But I was rudely awakened by my little dog SCRATCHING.

Standing on top of my and scratching and scratching and scratching.

I was ready to strangle her but it wasn't her fault.

She has very dry skin and it is worse this time of year.

But she was miserable and so was I.

So.......at MIDNIGHT, I could not stand it anymore.

I jerked her out of bed and THREW her in the tub.

I gave her a nice long bath with her medicated shampoo.

She whined and cried.

I wanted to whine and cry.

But after our little Midnight Dog Wash, I dried her off, put her back on the bed, wrapped her up in a blanket.

And guess what.

She went to sleep.

And so did I.

Characters coming alive.

2010-02-10T04:19:00.000-08:00

I would love to write a cozy mystery.
I like the genre, I think I understand the basic formula and I've had some pretty good ideas lately.
The question is:
What to do about the characters?
I read a mystery writer's web site and she said her characters push their way "on stage" in her imagination and demand to be heard. They insist on being listened to.
What if my characters are shy?
What if they have stage fright?
What if they need to be coaxed along?

How do I coax them out and give them a self-confident voice?

Yeah, I do believe.

2010-02-02T12:52:00.000-08:00

I do believe.
I believe in ghosts and I believe in aliens.
I don't know why people don't.
Oh and I believe in BigFoot or Sasquatch too.
Ghosts?
Sure. They are around.
People are energy.
People have souls and sometimes people have things left unfinished.
I think they may linger.
I think they may be lost or confused.
They may be angry but I don't think they will hurt you.
You may hurt yourself if you are afraid of them.
But I don't think they will hurt you.

Aliens.
Now aliens are a bit harder to explain.
But I think they are here.
I think they have been here for a very long time.
No, I don't think they built the Pyramids.
But I think they are here.
And if they aren't here already, they are trying to get here.
I don't know why.
But they are real and they are around.
If we can send probes to Mars and Saturn and land on the moon, why do we think that other life forms can't be sending probes here?
Maybe they are just curious.
Maybe they have the same concerns we do.

BigFoot?
I think Bigfoot could be real sure.
As vast as this planet is, there is no way we could have explored every square inch of it.
We don't know what's out there in the wilderness.
It's huge.
Why couldn't there be something out there that no one's ever seen?
Who know what's out there?
I think Bigfoot's real.
I do.

My migraines, they are a'changing.....

2010-01-30T09:14:00.001-08:00

Okay, this is getting a little weird.

I am not really worried because I don't think there is anything bad going on and I don't think there is anything anyone can do about it but my migraines (that I have had since I was about 18) are changing and doing some bizarre things that they have NEVER done before. I will mention it to the doctor when I see him in March though, since it is a change.

It just started this month. The last two migraines I have had, I have experienced (at the peak of the migraine) a left sided facial spasm involving my upper lip and my left eye. It feels very strange. I have no control over it and I can't do anything to stop it. My upper lip kind of curls and I can feel a little spasm under my left eye. They don't last very long (30 seconds, I don't know..) They feel like they are lasting 5 minutes but I know that isn't the case.

I looked it up on the computer and found a case study of a woman who experienced almost exactly the same thing with her migraines. It's called Hemifacial Spasms. So it is real, not just my imagination. I just want to make note of it and keep track so I can tell my doctor when I see him in March.

It's not scary but it is VERY interesting.

Excuse me, Mr Travolta.

2010-01-27T07:26:00.000-08:00

Excuse me, Mr. Travolta.
You are one of the few people who probably has enough money to BUY all of Haiti.

Would you mind hopping into your personal 737 and flying a planeload of supplies down to Haiti?
Oh and would you mind paying for all of it too, while you're at it?

RESPONSE 6 MONTHS AGO:
Go away. I am secluded in my private compound. Leave me alone.
I am facing my own personal tragedy.

RESPONSE NOW:
Sure! Gas up the jet! Load up those supplies. Oh,
By the Way......make sure you get a GOOD picture of me waving out of the window, I'm so damned cool, I can fly my OWN Jet.

Jet? Jett? Hmmmmmmm.....
Oh yeah Jett. It's what he would have wanted me to do.

Oh so now we're supposed to care...

2010-01-24T06:53:00.001-08:00

Okay..I'm sorry.
It was not really my intent to turn this into an "anti-Haiti" blog.
That was not really my intention at all.
And you can call me cynical or unsympathetic or just plain mean and hateful.
BUT that being said:
I am having a REALLY hard time with all of this fund-raising and "help the Haitians" rhetoric, especially the celebrities who are suddenly so compassionate about Haiti.
Six months ago NO ONE COULD HAVE CARED LESS ABOUT HAITI.
People were living in poverty, barely scratching out an existence.
No one gave a flying fig about the corruptions and the poverty, the lack of decent medical care, poor nutrition and general desperation of the population.
It wasn't even a blip on the radar screen.
If all of this support and all of this money had been funneled into Haiti and been properly used (and not stolen and exploited by the local gangs and thugs) the place may not be the cesspool that it is.
But Nooooooooo.
Six months ago, no one was doing telethons and fund raisers.
Six months ago NO ONE CARED ABOUT HAITI.
So NOW, we're supposed to care?

Give me a break.
Cynical...maybe I am.
Hypocritical? No. I refuse to say I care when I really don't.
Honest? Yeah.
Politically correct? Obviously not.

The Anderson and Sanjay Show

2010-01-20T04:31:00.001-08:00

Okay, now don't get me wrong here.
I actually like Anderson Cooper.

I think he is a passionate journalist and I felt really sorry for him when they teamed him up with the foul-mouthed Kathy Griffin on New Year's Eve.

That was one of the most uncomfortable, embarassing shows I have ever seen on television.

Ireally felt bad for him and hating watching him, squirm.

I felt every moment of the nervous laughter.

It was sad and unfortunate.

And I actually like Dr. Sanjay Gupta.

I think he would have made a fine Surgeon General of the United States.

I was actually kind of disappointed when he turned down the appointment.

I think he would have done an excellent job telling kids not to smoke and not to get pregnant.

He would have been very good at talking about Aids and Swine Flu and the importance of losing weight so you don't get diabetes when you reach 60.

No problem.

The problem I am having, however is watching the ongoing 'Andersen and Sanjay Show' on CNN for the last week.

These guys are their **STARS**.

They are eveywhere, tirlessly "reporting" the news, wearing their khaki t-shirts and jeans, rescuing children from mobs of looters and doing delicate emergency brain surgery under the worst of the worst conditions.

Where does the news (what there is of it) start and their performances stop?

Is it GRANDSTANDING for the cameras or is it genuine compassion?

I just don't know anymore.

****************************************************

BREAKING NEWS:

Another Earthquake Magnitude 6.1 hits 35 from Port Au Prince.

OH Crap. It had to happen.

******************************************************

Everyone (and I mean everyone would have been better off if the first one had been BIGGER to begin)

**************************************

And just one other very politically incorrect question here that I cannot help asking:

How come all of the worried adoptive "parents" that we have seen wringing their hands on CNN have been WHITE???

Haiti.....

2010-01-16T05:15:00.000-08:00

It is going to get MUCH worse....and it is NEVER going to get better.

Haiti Overload

2010-01-15T07:10:00.000-08:00

A week ago, a month ago, Haiti never crossed anyone's mind.'
Now we are tripping over ourselves to get out there and help.
Where was all that "help" before?
A few tireless missionaries trying to make things better in a miserable place?
Think what they could have done with even one million dollars BEFORE all this happened.
It is a tragedy.
These individuals do not deserve this kind of disaster.
But as a society it is a slum and a cesspool.
And it is also a show for CNN.
They go where the death and destruction is and they play it for the cameras.
Anderson Cooper in a tight T-shirt and jeans?
How many times do we have to see Sanjay Gupta "treat" that little baby?
Haiti is a slum and a cesspool.
Maybe if they just had a stable government, a decent economy, a functioning infrastructure and a society that is not internally corrupt. they would be better off.

The advantages to not throwing up...

2010-01-13T04:36:00.000-08:00

I have been so sick for the last week.
It started when I decided to do the responsible thing and make an appointment for a physical which I missed this year in the midst of breaking my ankle and in the middle of my Seasonal Affective disorder.
I just wasn't in the mood to see any doctors.
But last week, I was feeling better and I decided that it would be the responsible, adult thing for me to do so I stopped by my doctor's office to make an appointment.
HUGE mistake.
It seems that anywhere I am, if there is a foreign bug floating around it will attack me and I will get sick as a dog.
So....I go to my doctor's office and I get sick.
I was a little off for a couple of days last week and I thought I was getting better.
Until Monday.
Hubby suggested we go to lunch and take Cookie to the park for a while.
I said fine.
Ugh ugh ugh.
It wasn't "fine".
We had Mexican for lunch.
I ate most of it but I was getting sicker and sicker as the day went on.
I was dizzy and nauseous.
It was awful.
We made it to the park but only stayed for about 30 minutes.
I felt horrible.
And this was all GI stuff.
Upset stomach, the whole thing.
But throwing up was NOT an option.
It was a struggle but I did NOT want to start that.
Ugh.....TOO MUCH INFORMATION.. I know.
But there are definite advantages to not throwing up.
I was sick and miserable for two full days.
I was hardly able to get out of bed.
I felt horrible.
Finally, this morning, I felt a bit better.
I HAD to take a shower.
I HAD to do some laundry.
I HAD to wash my hair.
I had some toast and coffee.
I am going to go out for about an hour this morning.
Maybe some fresh air will help.

People say I get sick too much.
I've never thought that.
Other people just never seem to get sick.
So when I do, they view it as a crisis.
'I just view it as an opportunity for a virulent bug to ambush me.

I'm officially calling it quits.

2010-01-11T04:19:00.001-08:00

Okay.. I am officially calling it quits today. I know, I know. It's only eleven days in and I haven't really tried that hard. But I just don't seem to be able to do it.

I wanted to try keeping a journal. Not an online journal or a blog but a handwritten journal.

But it just isn't working and all it's doing it making me feel guilty.

I've tried before and failed at about this same point. So I don't think there's any point in spinning my wheels. I am just willing to admit defeat.

I am giving up on the idea.

I had this image of sitting at the coffee house, looking funky and eccentric and writing in my notebook. But y'know what?

That just isn't me.

The coffee house part is.

The funky and eccentric part is.

But the writing in the journal isn't.

I can admit it now.

I guess I am not really that good at expressing my feelings and sometimes, I just don't feel that strongly about things. So the handwritten journal just seems like a waste of time.

I quit.

I give up.

I know people do it.

I know some people are compulsive about it.

It's something they have to do.

But not me.

I am a failure at keeping a handwritten journal.

And today, I am officially calling it quits.

For now.

I'm never getting it back.

2010-01-09T06:46:00.000-08:00

I broke my ankle this summer.
And although the ankle has healed, I really don't think the rest of me has or ever will.
It was one of those turning points.
One of those times when you can point to the exact moment when something happened.
I am 60.
But I was always active and felt like I was 35.
I played golf 3 or 4 times a week. I walked 2 miles in the park.
But suddenly everything changed with this broken ankle.
I suddenly feel 60.
I can't move the way I did.
I don't feel the way I did.
And I don't think I ever will again.
There are turning points in every one's life and for me, this seems to be one of those moments.
I went from feeling and acting 35 to feeling and acting 60 in one moment.
I guess this is how it happens.
You just never recover 100%.
It's that dreaded "slippery slope" that we all face in one way or another.

Welcome to my New Blog.

2010-01-08T04:33:00.000-08:00

>>>>><<<<<<<
It's hard to know where to start.